Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Rainy Days

Wednesday and Rain-
ah how I LOVE the rain!
The window of the guest office I am using this week at the site I am working from has a huge window. It overlooks the Frys parking lot in Woodland Hills.
And out on the ledge is a nest with some baby hawks.
So the rain, the baby animals, and the distractions of a window are making for quite a lovely if very slow day at work today.

Looks like Kittys is the plan for Friday night-we'll be braving the chance of rain. This means the patio may be closed-which in turn means it will be SUPER packed in doors and smokers will be everywhere.
And I still don't know what I am going to wear.

The boy updated his profile on Tribe to show that naked photo as his profile main photo now. It no longer confuses me, just makes me sad. He's become one of THOSE types of boys. I find it so interesting how much people contradict themselves as their motivations change. Not that his motivations were not always fully driven by himself, but that his actions now completely contradict supposed ideals to such a degree. I really don't want to feel sorry for him, but I'm having trouble not.

In other news-got a cute email from the boy at the movie theater. He quoted some song that I have never heard of and said things that high school girls must like to hear. He also asked if I'd be 'into going to see my friends band play'. Oh My...

Also got an invite for dinner and drinks from a friend who now wants to try dating.
And someone I used to date has come out of hiding-like they always seem to know when to do-to try and reconnect and give things another go.

I'm starting to feel kinda sought after :)and that ain't a bad feeling at all.

So yes the shrink was right-I was allowing someone else to dictate my self-worth-
and yes he was right that I was going about not at all relaxed or happy for several months all out of an intense motivation to try and help said someone else.
Not proud of that, but happy that every day I'm able to recognize the power play and dictations for what they were.

Now I want to plan a trip to London-I've got less than 200 days to put that together.


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